On Thanksgiving day we celebrated 6 perfectly-imperfect years of marriage. Six years ago we became husband and wife at only 20 and 22 years young. Although we didn’t have a traditional wedding at all but a simple trip to the courthouse- that’s okay. My wedding day isn’t plagued with any sense of regret. Sure, it would have been nice to have had a beautiful wedding, with my dream dress surrounded by all my family and friends. And it would have been wonderful to have a room in our house full of beautiful pictures of us on our wedding day to look back on. But one day does NOT define our marriage. It will be the years to come…and in the future I would love to have that religious ceremony as we plan to renew our vows with God as our witness with the company of our kids. I will tell you this- what has defined this marriage has been the laughters and tears, the good days and the bad.
“Marriage is a commitment to care for one another in mutually-fulfilling ways. It is not an act but rather a life-long relationship that’s always evolving.”
So to my husband I want to tell you-
I know that I don’t always show it and I certainly don’t always say it enough as I should (I’m working on that)- but I am thankful for you. For the man you have become, for the man you are, and most importantly the father you are to our children.
Here we are 10 years, three kids, and a few wrinkles and grey hairs later- still standing strong. It’s amazing to love someone and be loved by someone for ten whole freakin years. I know that loving me is not always easy and I make it hard sometimes. I am not that young carefree 20 year girl you once fell in love with… together we have grown and you accept me for who I am.
For instance on mornings I am too tired and you wake up and get our son ready for school without making a noise so I get to sleep in an hour or two more, or on the days I have to work and you make sure you get all three kids showered and ready so I can drop them off ready and already fed, or days that you are off and make sure I wake up to a ready breakfast by the time I walk to the kitchen. Or when you decide to go grocery shopping after work and surprise me with a trés leches cake when you get home (you know the way to my heart so well). Even the small things you do make me smile; like a phone call on your break or setting up a date night for just us two without me knowing (because you know any time away from the kids is always needed) or when its late at night and you’re arriving home from work and I am a hot mess with tangled hair in a bun and baby spit on my shirt yet you still reach over and squeeze me and kiss me. Everything you do never goes unnoticed. I mean it when I say I would be lost without you.
Thank you for everything.
So I share openly when I say- with all honesty that marriage is hard work. Is easy more so often to quickly give up. I have felt like this at times, our first year of marriage was hard. You tend to focus on your work, your child, and trying to figure out the “new you” in motherhood and as a wife and quickly without knowing you forget what you guys once were before marriage.. before kids. Back to when life was all carefree, when money didn’t matter, when we could go out at midnight to drive downtown and get Starbucks simply because we wanted to, or times when we planned random date nights to Olive Garden followed by hours at the movie theater because we had no responsibilities or children to attend too.
Quickly all that had become forgotten. I admit our first year we had a lot of fights, many disagreements, becoming adults got the best of us. If there’s anything I am grateful for now are those arguments.I believe If there’s no fighting in a marriage how are you you going to grow with one another. It’s not always about being right but about building a mutual agreement and resolving the problem together. It’s all about sacrifices.
“Marriage is about becoming a team. You are going to spend the rest of your life learning about each other, and every now and then things blow up. But the beauty of marriage is that if you picked the right person and you both love each other, you’ll always figure out a way to get through it.”
I am sure there’s been a lot of things I’ve done wrong in our marriage but I am also confident enough to know I have always tried my best to make things right and to always try- no matter what. But despite those mistakes I am proud of where we are, what we have accomplished together so young and what we will continue to bring in the future together.
You are my strength, my equal, and my biggest supporter. Happy Anniversary Gustavo, I am so blessed and couldn’t be more proud to be your wife.
“I love you today and always.I’ll choose you over and over again. Without a pause, without a heartbeat, I’ll keep choosing you,”